I'm twenty-one years old, so i wouldn't call it teenage angst. First off, I'm not a teenager, second "angst" is a "feeling of anxiety". I just happen to hate the world and the women who inhabit it. I have to ask myself is it my fault or the fault of the women who get my hopes up. The sad reality is that these women would rather kiss another women they bring their lips anywhere near mine. I'm not saying I date a lot of lesbians, but if the choice was me, or her best friend, she would share that moment with her best friend before me. 

     Then again, I'm not like most boys. While the majority of my graduating class was out on the wrestling mats grouping, and grabbing at each other, i was in the theater belting my heart out to "Les Mis". I don't secret testosterone. I drive a VW Beetle, I carry a "man -bag" with all my essentials, my Ipod pumps out show tunes 24/7 and my first kiss may have been a man. I'm straight and single. Its not really a mystery. 

    Rather than secret testosterone, Its a slow leak, that drips out bit by bit. Its because of this I have so many friends that are girls. Because of my "fairer" nature they become comfortable with me. Asking my opinion on important matters such as weather her hair should be up or down. This is where men have to be careful. If they become too complacent with someone as a friend, you will undoubtedly end up as the gay best friend, a conversation I've had several times always ending in "you're a great guy, but i would never date you" haunting words only surpassed by the fact I've heard them multiple times. 

    Relationships are tough. To tell someone that you have feelings for them is scary. Feelings are apart of being, and to go to some one and say "here, have part of me" only to have that person shoot it down is devastating. Any one who says differently has either never entered the dating scene with the intention of dating, or is a psychopath who feels no emotion. After being crushed most people will become cold, and turn away from the world, cursing the dating world and those happy in it. I can't. To be in a relationship is one of my favorite things in the world. When with someone, you always have an open ear, a shoulder to cry on, and  any other cleche i missed.

    I dont know if anyone will read my blog pre or postmortem, i don't want anyone to read it, although secretly i want the whole world to hear me complain about something everyone goes through. But what you should know is that im not a guitarist for a band who wold seduce you with generic lyrics about a a women twenty girls ago, Im not devilishly good looking nor do i sparkle in the sunlight, but I'm also not some ass whole who would say "I love you" then a week later leave you for someone else. I'm just a curmudgeon, who deals with his issues by making fun of everyone else's faults. I'm broken, but when i say I love you, I mean it. When I say I told you so, i mean you should have picked me the first time around, instead of making me watch you cry.